[cov·et]

Do you have that one friend where you are constantly looking their approval or acceptance?

It dosn't necessarily have to be the case where you say, "He's pressuring me into pot, so I think I'll try some."

This friend can just be anyone, Christian, Muslim, Black, White, Girl, Guy, pastor, king, random hobo you made friends with walking by a stopped train one day.

But you have this friend, you might not know it, but you could possibly have a friend like this. And you are either in one of three stages: the stage where you have no idea what I'm talking about but are blindlessly doing things to try to gain their heart's approval of you, the stage where you are reading this going "...Oh. I might be doing stage one...(well, now you're doing stage two by realizing that.) or stage 3, where you are saying to yourself "ohhh yeah. been there, done that. and now I am..."


and now I am, dot dot dot. What are YOU doing about this friend now? Are you still seeking approval or acceptance? This person is something special to you, maybe romantically, maybe because you really wish you were like them, maybe just because by being accepted by that one person it's your gateway to being accepted by others. Maybe this person makes you feel your most extremes; what I mean by 'extremes' is that they make you feel REALLY happy! or REALLY angry! or REALLY sad! or REALLY confused. but all you know is you want them to LIKE you, and maybe once in a while tell you how much they appreciate you.

now step back. take a look around. just step back from that person for a second and consider this: have you recently brushed or shooed someone's positive comment off? is there that one friend who ALWAYS says "hi, how are you?" while the person who you're trying to gain approval all just glances at you? maybe she/he is doing it in a jokingly way, but you know that there are other people who actually do care about you and appreciate you. and they tell you about it, too...

i've realized we live in a society of coveting. all of America is this way in general. we are spinning backwards trying to get the latest iPhone, "oh wait i thought you just got a new one two months ago?" "well yeah but this new one includes..." dot dot dot. we want things we cannot have.

and yes, God does play a role in all of this. He is constantly giving and giving, and what do we do? "God, i'd like to put in a request for a new iPhone, please." "God, i'd like to put in a request for a new boyfriend, please." "okay God, I know i prayed for a new boyfriend like yesterday and You gave me one but i don't like him that much anymore. i want THAT one."

that is why we want people's approval. because we want what we can't have.

i've learned that patience, time, God, and healing can change that.